NordicsxReader Coming Out

"I'm going to tell them."

It's probably the thousandth time you've said that in the time span of about a year, but this time you really mean it. You're positive. 

Elizabeta sits up, placing her chin in the palm of her hand and propping her elbow up on her mattress as she looks at you. "For real this time?" She asks, because she knows your habit of chickening out at the last second. 

You nod. "Yes." You turn your gaze from the ceiling of Elizabeta's room to the Hungarian girl lying next to you. "I think when we've reached this stage, I kind of have to tell them." 

She nods slowly, though she looks worried. She has a reason to, of course. "Just..." Eliza struggles to find the words to say, before she sighs, and her head drops back down onto her pillow.

It's your turn to sit up, and as you do so, the white blanket slips off your body, exposing your naked form. You don't really care, though, as you grab your bra and shirt from the ground and slip them on. Thankfully, the shirt covers the love bites on your shoulders and base of your neck. "You're leaving now?" Eliza moans through her pillow, no doubt feeling your weight lift off her bed.

"Gotta do it now, before I lose confidence." You say, glancing at your girlfriend of a year over your shoulder. "'sides, I promised Tino I'd be back early."

"I'll give you a ride." Elizabeta says, getting to her feet and reaching for her favourite green shirt. 

You smile, briefly, before moving closer to her, cupping her face in your hands, and kissing her on the lips.

---

"You're sure you don't want me to come in?" Elizabeta asks for possibly the twentieth time since you've gotten into the car with her. The two of you are comfortably silent as the scenery passes by. 

"Yes, I'm positive." You say calmly. "I appreciate your concern, but I think I want to do this alone." You cast a smile in her direction. It's understandable why she's nervous. When she first told her parents that the two of you were dating, she had brought you along. Her parents had been completely enraged, and her father had come at you with a dinner knife, yelling at you for "corrupting" their daughter.

Needless to say, you were not invited over for Thanksgiving anytime soon, and Eliza had found herself homeless. She had spent a day crying on your shoulder at your house, while your brothers were under the impression that she was going through "girl stuff" and left you both alone. Thankfully, her ex-boyfriend/friend Roderich let her stay with him for as long as she needed to stay, and luckily he lived close enough to you that you two could see each other whenever you wanted.

"How do you think they'll take it?" She suddenly asks.

You pause, thinking over the question. How will they take it? You wonder to yourself, staring out the window at the clouds passing by. You had no idea what your family would think once they found out your sexuality. They had never suspected anything about you being a lesbian for the years you had all lived together - so basically your entire lives. You had discovered your interest in girls around the age of fifteen, and even after three years you had never told any of them. 

Actually, you had never felt the need to tell them. You were completely single, and very few girls you knew enough to actually like in "that" way had either not come out, were straight, or you didn't like them in "that" way, so your sexuality didn't really have anything to do with your everyday life as far as you were concerned. And then, even after meeting and beginning to date Elizabeta a year ago, you still hadn't told them.

Well, today is the day. You're finally telling them all. 

You begin to picture their reactions in your mind. Berwald, of course, stays as silent and stoic as ever. Tino looks somewhat stunned. Emil doesn't know what to think. Lukas stares at you blankly. And Mathias... what would Mathias do? Seriously, you have no idea. Your eldest brother's reaction possibly was the one that meant the most to you. Out of all five of your brothers, Mathias was the one you were closest to. If he didn't accept you... you had no idea what you would do then.

"Uhhhh..." You rub your eye as you struggle to think of what their actual reactions would be, besides shock and disbelief. "They'll probably be shocked. At first."

"I don't doubt that." Eliza snorts. "Remember Gilbert's reaction? For once he was actually speechless!" 

You laugh at the memory of the albino's expression when Eliza told him and Roderich that she was gay. Roderich had seriously no problem with it, as long as neither of you did anything "inappropriate" under his roof. (You bite back another laugh at the memory of what the two of you did last night. Sorry 'bout that, Roddy.) But Gilbert had looked like he was about to pass out, and had stayed like that for a good five minutes before leaping up and pulling the two of you into a hug, proclaiming it "almost as awesome as the awesome me" that you two were dating. 

"But then..." You pause again. "I don't know how they'd react." 

"Well, good luck." Eliza says.

"What?"

"We're here." 

You turn around and look back out the window. Sure enough, you've pulled up in front of your Nordic household. You blink in surprise. "Oh." You face your girlfriend. "Wish me luck again. For luck."

"Good luck." She says, and she gives you a smile that makes your heart flutter no matter how many times you see it. "And, if they don't take it well, not that they won't take it well!" She quickly adds upon seeing your face turn white and eyes widen in horror. "You're always welcome to live with us."

You swallow. "Well, this is it." You close your eyes, prepping yourself - and give Eliza one last kiss on the lips - before picking up your overnight bag and opening the car door. With heavy steps, you march towards your front door, and after watching Elizabeta pull out of your driveway, open the door.

"(NAME) IS BACK!" You hear, before you're crushed in a tight hug from Mathias. 

"Ma-thi-as!" You manage to choke out. "Can't - ack!"

Instantly, you're released from your tight hold and you gasp for breath for a moment before giving your eldest brother a half-hearted glare. "Why do you insist on always doing that?!" You demand, punching him somewhat lightly in the chest. Mathias is about as strong as he looks, so he doesn't get hurt very easily, which means you can be as rough as you want without seriously injuring him. Yet, because of the nurturing side of you, no matter how small it was, you never wanted to inflict that much harm on him. 

Mathias instantly laughs a laugh that echoes through the house. "Because I can!"

"And I can stab you with a fork, does that mean I should do that?"

"Well, do you want to?"

"Don't tempt me."

"You're so meeaan! Have you been hanging around Lukas lately?"

"She lives in the same house, stupid." Lukas says as he comes down the stairs, passing the two of you and heading into the living room. "Of course she's been hanging around me."

"To be fair," Emil, the only younger brother you have, states as he comes over. "She hasn't been around the house as much lately."

"Right!" Mathias agrees, swinging an arm around your shoulder and practically dragging you into the living room, Emil following you both. "She's been hanging around Elizabeta far too much lately! I bet it's her who's corrupting you! We should get rid of the frying pans before it's too late."

You snort slightly as you sit down on the couch, sighing in relaxation as you put your feet up on the table and slide down a bit. "It's good to be home." 

"(Name)! You're home! Good!" You look up and smile upon seeing Tino, who is standing in the doorway leading to the kitchen wearing an apron, wiping off his hands with a towel and smiling brightly. "Just in time for breakfast!"

"Actually, I already ate at Eliza's house." You say. "And I'm kinda tired... do you mind if I just skip out this time?"

Tino looks slightly concerned, but then smiles and nods. "Of course. Get some rest."

"And..." You swallow. "I have something to talk about with everyone. So, if you would all meet me in the living room when you're done..." You trail off, seeing the stares you're getting from your family. 

"What is it you want to talk about?" Emil asks, beginning to frown. "You're not in trouble, are you?" In all honesty, it's odd for someone younger than you to be worried about you, but you've learned to deal with it, and besides, you've worried about your elder brothers more times than you can count.

"Ha!" Mathias laughs, breaking the tension in the room. "(Name) couldn't get in trouble if her life depended on it! She's way too sweet!" His declaration is proven wrong when you throw a pillow at him. It hits his face with such force it knocks him off his perch on the couch's armrest and onto the ground. It's enough to make the most-of-the-time emotionless Lukas smirk, Tino let out a small squeak that sounds like a mixture of laughter and panic, and Emil snort in amusement. 

"Where's Berwald?" You ask, as if you haven't just attacked your brother.

"He's still asleep." Tino says as he helps Mathias get up. "He had a long day at work yesterday, so he's sleeping in." 

Moments after he says this, the sound of heavy footsteps comes from above you all and begin to head down the stairs. Within seconds, your second eldest brother is standing in the living room, hair a mess, eyes half open, and glasses somewhat askew. You grin hugely at the sight of him. "Berwald!" You cry from your place on the couch. "How are ya?"

The Swede stares blankly at you for a moment, before mumbling, "T'r'd." 

"I hear ya." You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "By the way, I'm not joining you guys for breakfast, and there's gonna be a meeting after breakfast in the living room because I have something to tell you guys. Now I'm going to head up to my room." You get to your feet,  pausing to give Berwald a small hug ("How come he gets a hug?" "Shut it, Dane.") before you disappear around the corner and head for your room. 

Once reaching your door, you push past it and step into your room. The walls are painted (f/c), and the ceiling is painted blue and white and designed to look like clouds. Glow-in-the-dark stars are littered across your ceiling, still glowing faithfully even after all the years they've been there. 

You drop your overnight bag onto the floor unceremoniously, not bothering to unpack anything. (If your family didn't take the news well, you'd need it pretty quickly, now wouldn't you?) Instead, you walk to the bulletin board nailed to the wall by your bed. It's covered in an array of photo's, all of them stuck proudly to the board with different coloured thumb-tacks. While most of them are displayed so that there isn't an inch of the photo covered, there are a few you keep hidden behind others. Such as a picture of you and Elizabeta kissing that Gilbert took a few days after she came out to him, a picture that Gilbert had accidentally taken while fleeing for his life shortly after taking the picture of you and Elizabeta kissing that featured you laughing loudly while Elizabeta reached towards Gilbert, mouth open in mid-yell and green eyes ablaze, a picture of Elizabeta and you sleeping on Roderich's couch in a gentle embrace, her head on your chest and your cheek resting on the top of her head, and lastly, a picture of the two of you on your first date that you had asked a waiter to take for you. 

In the last photo, your hair is pulled back into a messy french braid, styled for you by your Canadian friend Madeline, and you wear no makeup whatsoever. You're wearing a fancy dark red dress, the skirt reaching your knees and the collar forming a halter-top, and a pair of black high heels with leg straps. Elizabeta is sporting her trademark pink flower hair clip, while her long light brown hair flows down her back in beautiful waves that frame her face. She is wearing a strapless, sleeveless black-and-dark-wine-purple coloured vertical striped dress with silk ruffles along the hemline that falls just above her knees. The two of you had gone to a Japanese place for your date, and the picture had been taken just as Elizabeta's mouth had fallen open in despair as her piece of sushi fell from her chopsticks and your eyes had closed and your mouth had opened in a laugh as you faced her, arms crossed on the table as you leaned in closer, one leg crossed over the other underneath the table. 

It had been a good moment. 

You smile as you brush your fingers against the photo-Elizabeta. "I'm doing this for us." You whisper. "We won't have to sneak around anymore... we won't have to pretend. They'll know, and we can be with each other without the lies..." Even if they didn't take it well... even if they kicked you out... at least they would know. 

You suck in a breath and sigh, deeply. Then you turn your attention to the rest of the photo's. Most of them are of you and your family. There's one of Mathias's graduation - something you're sure most people never thought would come - and in it, you're laughing loudly while Tino is covering his face (either to hide his identity or stifle his laughs, you weren't sure), Berwald stares blankly, Lukas is facepalming, and Emil has already looked away from Mathias, who has appeared on stage and thrown open his robe to reveal the fact that he is wearing nothing but his boxers underneath. Next to it is a picture you had taken yourself, of a surprisingly peaceful moment between your brothers.  Emil is curled up on the couch, cheek resting against the armrest and his childhood stuffed toy Mr. Puffin in his arms. Lukas is sitting next to him, eyes closed and book open in his lap, mouth slightly open. A blanket has been thrown over them both, placed there by Tino, who is laying on the ground and has his head resting on Berwald's shoulder. Berwald's head is tilted slightly to the left, and his glasses are askew, and Hanatamago - your old dog, who you were sad to say had died last year - curled up on his lap. Mathias is the only one awake, and he is smiling, one hand rubbing the back of his neck as he looks over them all the way an eldest brother should.

A smirk appears on your face as your hand drifts over the next picture. You're in this one, and you're proudly sporting a bloody nose, grinning hugely (and showing off a gap in your front teeth from when you had lost a tooth) despite the blood rushing down your face, while Tino is fussing over you and waving furiously at whoever is taking the picture. That memory is probably your favourite. It had been when Emil had been nine and you were at least eleven. Your only little sibling had come home from school crying, saying how a boy in the neighborhood had stolen Mr. Puffin from him. Because your elder brothers hadn't been home, no one had been able to stop you from taking Emil by his elbow, leading him out the door, and asking him to point to the boy who had taken Mr. Puffin.

Luckily it hadn't taken too long for you two to find the boy. You had charged up to the bully - who was a year older than you, you noticed but didn't really care about - and told him to give the toy back. He had sneered, and you had punched him in the face, tackled him, and then continued hitting him. It was only when you were bleeding heavily from your nose and he had a black eye and a bloody nose that he agreed to give the toy back. You and Emil (happily holding onto his stuffed bird) had marched home, heads held high - at least until you came face to face with Tino, who instantly went into mama-bear mode upon seeing your blood.

"(Name)?"

You jerk in surprise, and turn around to see the very brother you had been thinking about so fondly. Emil stands in the doorway, watching you carefully with icy-blue eyes. 

"Emil." You smile. "I was just," you glance over at the pictures. "lost in memories..." You say, staring at the photo's. They all showed so much happiness and family love, and when every single one had been taken, you had never doubted once that your brothers loved you. Would they still love you once you told them the truth?

A rare smile appears on Emil's face, before he walks further into your room and stands next to you. You are suddenly very glad that you had thought ahead and covered your pictures of you and Elizabeta so carefully no one would see them unless they actually tried. 

"(Name)." Emil says, and you look at him. His silver hair is sort of shining under the lights of your room, and he looks somewhat uncomfortable. "Breakfast is over."

You freeze momentarily, before relaxing instantly. But not quick enough for Emil to not notice. "Right." You say, sighing and running your fingers through your hair. "I'm coming. Just need a second." Oh, god, this is it. You're finally going to tell them. This is it. The moment that may possibly define your life for the rest of it... this is it. 

You're ready.

"(Name)," Emil says your name for a third time. "Is there something... bothering you?" When you don't answer, he continues. "Because you can tell me - you can tell us anything. We're family. That's what we're here for."

"Family." You repeat. "Emil, can you tell me something?" Not waiting for a response, you continue. "Do you love me?"

"Yes!" He says instantly. Then he stutters, "I mean, not in that way, not in a love-love way, but in a family way, of course."

"And love is unconditional, isn't it?"

After nodding, Emil looks at you again. "(Name), are you sure you're alright?"

You nod. "Yes, I'm sure." You grab your brother's hand, and pull him out of your room. "Come on."

This is it. 

In a matter of minutes, you're the only one standing up. Lukas is sitting in his favourite armchair, Berwald and Mathias are sitting on the couch, Tino is perched on the armchair of the same couch next to Mathias, and Emil is sitting on the floor in front of the couch, knees pulled up to his chest. All of them are staring at you intensely, waiting for you to speak.

Meanwhile, you are prepping yourself up. 'Kay, (Name), this is it. Don't freak out. Just breathe. Tell them. They'll be fine with it. Suddenly your mind begins to drift off to a distant memory - one of a furious father of your Hungarian girlfriend, chasing you down with a dinner knife, and then you think of the very sharp weapons from your viking ancestors Mathias and Berwald keep, and the Finnish sniper Tino keeps hidden under his bed at all times.

No! Bad (name)! They wouldn't do that, especially not Tino! 

Not surprisingly, it's Mathias who breaks the tense silence. "(Name), are you going to tell us what's up or not?" He sounds slightly irritated, but it's overcome by worry. 

"Right." You breathe in again. "And... before I say anything, let me just say that I have no idea how to say this, so if I say something stupid, it's totally not my fault."

"You weren't expelled, were you?" Lukas says in his normal monotone voice.

"No."

"You're not asking for money, are you?" Tino asks. 

"No, I'm not asking for anything-" You run your hand over your face tiredly. "Except mercy. And no violence or yelling. That would be nice. It would be really sweet if no one, you know, hit me or anything."

Suddenly, Mathias is on his feet and pointing at you, eyes wild. "You're pregnant, aren't you!"

It takes a blank stare and two blinks from you to send the room into chaos. Everyone is on their feet now. Mathias is yelling things in Danish, and you're pretty sure it's something along the lines of "Tell me who the bastard is (name) and I'll rip their spleen out and eat it in front of them! No one knocks up my baby sister!" and he's knocked over the table in the middle of the living room that Berwald bought from IKEA. Tino is attempting to calm down Mathias, but looks utterly furious and is hissing under his breath. Berwald is radiating a murderous dark blue aura, and his eyes are ablaze. Lukas is also yelling, something about "innocent little sister" and "bastards" and "troll" and "dark magic" and "not going to ever be able to reproduce ever again". Emil is standing by your side, looking slightly panicked, one hand on your shoulder and asking you over and over again if it was true, and if it was, "It'll be okay, (Name), they'll calm down, just relax, it'll be okay..."

It's only when you hear someone - you weren't sure who - say something about a boyfriend that you finally snap out of your stunned state. "QUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEET!" You scream at the top of your lungs. It's loud enough to make everyone stop what they're doing and cover their ears. Once you've stopped yelling, they look at you. Your hands are clenched into fists, and you're breathing heavily. "Will you all just sit down and listen to me?!"

Your brothers all learned from an early age that when you're mad, it's best to do as you say. So they quietly move back to the positions they had been in before, all of them still looking angry, but at least they're silent.

"(Name), who was it?" Mathias demands, leaning forward. 

"I'm not pregnant, doofus!" You snap. "Now all of you shut up and listen to me, damnit!"

Finally, they're all silent, and even Mathias is smart enough not to say anything else. 

You take a deep breath. This is for you, Eliza. "Okay. Here it is." For us. "I'm a lesbian."

Instantly, the room goes even quieter than it had been a moment before. 

"And I'm dating Elizabeta."

More silence. You could hear a pin drop.

"And I thought you should know."

At some point, your eyes had dropped down to the table flipped over on the floor. Now you look back up at your family. 

First, you look at Lukas. For once, his poker face (as Mathias calls it) has cracked, and his dark blue eyes are wide as he looks at you. His mouth is slightly dropped open in surprise. 

Then you look at Berwald. For the most part, his expression hasn't changed, but his eyes are slightly wider than they had been a minute before, and he's looking at you in a slightly different way than he normally does. 

You quickly look past Mathias and glance at Tino. He looks mildly surprised. His violet eyes are wide, and his almost-constant smile has been replaced by a flat line.

Emil. He looks almost exactly like Lukas at this moment. His mouth has dropped open, and he's staring at you, blinking several times.

Finally, you chance a look at Mathias - and now it's your turn to blink in surprise. 

Your oldest brothers expression has remained unchanged. He looks somewhat surprised, but at the same time amused, and he has a small grin on his face. A normal grin, not a sadistic Get out of our house, dyke kind of grin.

For the second time, it's Mathias who breaks the silence. "Oh, is that all?" He sounds so amused...

You stare blankly at him for a moment. 

Suddenly, rage explodes within you, and the next thing you know you have launched yourself across the room towards Mathias, and you are hitting him furiously while he laughs and shields himself with his arms. Tino lets out a small yelp, Emil quickly moves out of your way, and everyone continues to stare as you pummel Mathias with your fists. "'Oh, is that all?'" You mock him through clenched teeth, hitting him as hard as you can with every word. "I-just-told-you-all-my-biggest-secret-ever-and-that's-all-you-can-say? 'Oh, is that all'?!" 

A strong hand suddenly grabs your left wrist, temporarily immobilizing you. You look over at Berwald, who has your wrist in his tight grip and is watching you calmly. "(N'me), r'l'x." He says. 

"I think what Mathias is trying to say," Tino says then, shooting Mathias a slightly irritated look. Mathias sends back a cheeky grin. "Is that it doesn't matter to us, (Name)."

You freeze.

"It m'kes no d'iff'r'nce." Berwald agrees. "(N'me) is st'll (N'me)."

"You're still our sister." Lukas says, standing up and approaching you. He puts a hand on your shoulder.

"Is this what you were talking about?" Emil asks, getting up and staring at you. "In your room? You wanted to know whether or not we would still love you?" 

Slightly stunned, you nod, wordlessly. 

"That's ridiculous!" Emil exclaims, sounding shocked.

"Why wouldn't we still love you?" Tino demands, placing his hand against your cheek gently.

"You're still the same (Name) you were when you returned this morning." Lukas says. "You're still our family."

"You just like vagina's over dicks! No big deal!" Mathias says, grinning - and is instantly hit over the head by Emil, as Lukas is too busy with you to do so. "Hey, you gotta bring over Elizabeta soon! Now we can meet her as your girlfriend!"

You swallow. Tears begin to spring to your eyes, and your rub your eyes with your fist in an attempt to keep them down. "Damn it!" You sob, losing the battle and letting the water stream down your face. "You guys are the best!" Then you fling your arms around Tino, sobbing into his shoulder while he hugs you. Lukas rubs your back gently, Emil pats your shoulder awkwardly, and then suddenly the entire family is brought in for a group hug, courtesy of Mathias. 

"You just realized that now?" Mathias laughs, and everybody is too focused on you to bother hitting him.

You sniff, attempting to touch some part of everybody in your family. "God, I love you guys so much." You whisper, but it's loud enough so everyone hears you. 

"We love you too, (Name)." They all say.

---

"So, you're sure they're alright with us?" Elizabeta asks for the tenth time since you've both pulled up in front of your house. 

"I'm one-hundred-percent positive." You reply, taking her hand and squeezing it. You are about to introduce Elizabeta to your family - this time as your girlfriend, not just your friend. And she was a bit nervous. 

"Alright." She nods, and the two of you exit the car.

You push the front door open. "We're here!" You call out into the house. Instantly, Tino appears, and he is smiling as he always is. 

"Elizabeta!" He says cheerfully, smiling at her. He's noticed how nervous she looks, and is attempting to calm her worries - something you're grateful for. "It's so good to see you again."

"Thanks. You too, Tino." Eliza says, smiling - albeit a little weakly, but at least it's something. 

"(Name)," He says then, turning to face you. "Could I get some help in the kitchen? The others want to talk to Elizabeta."

You roll your eyes and sigh. "Fine..." You manage to pull the Hungarian into your household, and point her in the direction of the living room. "Good luck, love." You say, pressing a kiss against her cheek, before following the Finnish man to the kitchen.

Elizabeta takes a deep breath, before heading towards the living room. The moment she sets foot in the room, she freezes. 

Mathias has a five-foot-five ax leaning against his chair, the blade gleaming in the light. And he's smiling. He's the only one in the room who has a weapon, but it doesn't stop the three other men from being absolutely terrifying.

"Hello, Eliza!" Mathias says, far too cheerful for someone who owns an ax that sharp. 

"Good t' see y'u." Berwald grunts calmly.

Lukas and Emil merely nod at her. Elizabeta gulps nervously.

"Now, we have no problem with you and (Name)'s relationship." Lukas says coolly.

"But, if you hurt her in any way," Emil begins.

"Well, we'll show you our log cabin deep in the woods, high in the mountains, where no one ever goes!" Mathis finishes cheerfully. 

"'nd y'u w''ldn't want th't, w''ld you?" Berwald asks. 

Elizabeta stares at them all for a moment. Her eyes are wide. 

Suddenly, you appear behind her. "I knew you all would pull something like this." You sigh, wrapping your arms around Eliza, who seems to have frozen. 

Tino has appeared as well. "It's just our way of showing you we love you." He says, smiling. He pats Elizabeta's shoulder gently, bringing her out of her shock. "Don't worry. No one is going to be hurting anyone."

Eliza shoots him a grateful smile, which he returns. Then it becomes less friendly and more terrifying. "Unless you break (Name)'s heart. Then I'll show you exactly how the Finnish won the Winter War."